We feel the need to help when someone opens
their heart, we sense we can advice them to take better decisions, to become
greater or to achieve a goal. We then
walk away with the feeling we helped, guided and bettered our karma.
But now I question it. Is it because of
that pure light satisfaction we help? Do we help because we feel better by it?
What if we had to sacrifice that very sensation we get from helping, would we
still help?
Because when I reflect about it, a man
begging for money makes us feel offended, when the sales assistant actively ask
you for a donation with your purchase you feel forced, like the decision to
help is not your own, even if it is. And often we choose not to. Too often we
walk away defending our actions as fair because it made us uncomfortable.
When someone begs for your help you feel
demanded, unfairly treated because that person has self-centred themselves and
not you.
I don’t know many people sacrificing their
own satisfaction of helping to the extent to save someone. We always feel like
we have to be the one dragging up someone from the cliff while we are stable on
our feet by chains that prevent us from falling down.
It goes with Darwin’s theory that the
strongest survives. We don’t want to be thrown weakness in our aura, we reject
the needy and we still portrait ourselves as heroes. Those times however we
have helped when someone asked for it we have replaced the feeling of being a
hero to be in misery. We blame those who asked us that they now forced us into
their weak position.
We haven’t yet learned to give without
expecting it back, because if we had asking for help would not beat the pride
of ours, it would not communicate our weaknesses.
I feel the world we live in now don’t leave
us much choice. We need to be self-centred to survive; we need to hide our
needs to not be outvoted of evolution.
Or can we change? The first change comes
from within, I aim to help even when it is formulated directly as close to a
demand it can get. Because in this world when someone ask for help it is in
their most desperate place, when there is no other way out. If I know that, I
go against my nature if I say no. I take the risk to be used rather than the
risk to not been brave enough to sacrifice. And that’s why I ask you now
If we made the sun happy without expecting
it to shine would it still shine?
My answer is that we don’t know, and that
will have to remain the beauty of our actions. A step to the unknown where the
benefits might not be necessary and only the action in that instant will be
meaningful.
